Raleigh, NC: Dozens of male concertgoers left with ‘burst testicles’ after opera singer hits high note
Dozens of male guests at an opera performance in Raleigh, NC have been left with serious injuries after a freak accident saw their testicles literally explode when the performer sang a sustained high-pitched note.
Concert attendees were left shocked and paramedics were immediately dispatched to attend to the scene at a local concert venue late last night. “It was just chaos,” said one female attendee, who said her husband was rushed to hospital with burning pain in his genitals. “The singer hit this high note and moments later men were grabbing their groins.”
While many may be familiar with the trope of an opera singer hitting a high note and causing a glass window to shatter, few realize that this is actually more than possible, particularly for powerful tenors. “In rare cases, such as this incident, the singer may hit a note that is the natural resonance for any number of fragile materials - in this case, male testicles.”
Not all male guests were affected, which can be explained by the variance in testicle size and weight. A surgeon at the hospital familiar with the treatment said generally men with larger, heavier testicles were more likely to have suffered. “Our theory is the smaller ones did not resonate at the right frequency to explode.”
The organizers of the event have offered full refunds to all guests and issued a sincere apology. “Never in our wildest dreams could we have anticipated causing such harm to our audience.” It remains unclear if the singer involved will continue on the rest of his American concert bookings.